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Excitement, happiness, anticipation, nervousness…..these are all feelings that rush through a couple’s mind when they find out they are expecting their first child. Then the questions start flooding in: Will it be a boy or girl? Who will it look like? Will it be healthy? What do we need? This last question can be a bit daunting. However, similar to being newly engaged, couples find joy in planning for their new life together and begin making lists of all the things they would like to have. Couples start to research baby items, begin asking all of their friends with children what they like and dislike, and then rush out to make a baby registry.
One item that gives individuals the biggest headache is the baby crib. With the number of crib manufacturers making news over recent years for faulty and unsafe cribs, parents are spending hours upon hours in deliberation because their child’s life is in question. With prices of cribs ranging from hundreds to thousands of dollars, this may be the item that couples are prepared to spend the most money on in order to guarantee their child’s safety. But with all these hours spent worrying about what crib to purchase, have expectant parents ever sat back to ask themselves: Is a crib really the best option for my child? The statistics are enough to make any parent apprehensive and it seems that every few months a different crib model is under question. Since 2007 drop-side cribs have been responsible for more than five million crib recalls in the U.S. and Canada and cribs continue to be associated with the highest child injury rates of any nursery item. Approximately 50 infants each year are killed and another 9,000 are injured in crib-related accidents in the U.S. New parents have enough to worry about without adding the stress of sleepless nights wondering if their child is safe.
Let’s put aside the horrific stats about cribs for a moment and look at their history. Early humans used to place their infants in hollowed out trees that eventually turned into rocking cradles, similar to what we know today. Once the child outgrew that (around 3 months), he was placed on a trundle bed (small mattress) that could easily be stored under where the parents slept. By the 1800’s cribs came into existence and were primarily used in North America, Europe, and Australia where families could afford homes with multi-rooms. Cribs were designed to keep the child up off the cold ground and away from drafts in these early, poorly insulated houses.
Now we will examine the specific definition of a crib: “Infant beds [cribs] are designed to restrict the baby to the bed”. This is a rather shocking statement. Is this really the hope that parents have for their child? “To restrict, to confine, to hold back, to impede, and to handicap” their child? Highly doubtful. No parent would intentionally do something to harm their child’s natural development. But if we think about it, how is it possible for the child to get into the crib? He is dependent upon the adults to place him in. How does the child get out of the crib? Again, he is dependent upon the adults and has to cry to get attention. Is this the type of behavior that parents want to instill in their child? That he has to cry to get attention? Probably not.
I think it is time to look at another option. Most Montessori teachers around the world are familiar with using a Low Bed instead of a crib and those that have tried it rave about its success. Not only is this a cheaper, safer, and unrestrictive option, it provides tremendous benefits for the child’s natural development. The low bed is simply a firm, small mattress (Approx. W: 28˝ x L: 52˝ x H: 5˝) placed on the floor in the child’s room where one might imagine a crib to go. It is fitted with rubberized flannel (in case of accidents) under a tight bottom sheet, with a blanket on top to provide the child with warmth. It is imperative for parents to prepare their child’s room if they choose to go this route. Eventually all families will have to baby-proof the entire house, so they might as well begin by making their child’s room a very safe place with a baby gate at the door if need be.
Firstly, the low bed offers the child the respect that he deserves when developing healthy sleeping habits. The child is able to wake up and fall asleep on his own, with time to explore the environment visually (without bars restricting his view). Eventually when the child is mobile, he will be able to go to bed when tired and get up when he chooses. The child will then be free to crawl off the low bed and explore a few toys that may be displayed on a low shelf. This allows the child the opportunity to be on his own, working in concentrated activity, while at the same time letting the parents sleep in peace!
The need for providing children with a low bed originated from Maria Montessori’s many years of scientific observation. She observed children from all around the world and discovered that all individuals develop in a similar manner, regardless of time, place or culture. She identified that every child was born with specific characteristics, which she termed the “Human Tendencies”. These tendencies aid the individual in coming to understand the environment in which he lives. All of the Human Tendencies (exploration, orientation, order, movement, communication, repetition, and mathematical mind) operate naturally but if a Human Tendency is not able to function properly, the individual will not be able to develop to his full potential.
The Human Tendency for exploration is fully satisfied when providing a low bed for the child instead of a crib. Human beings have a natural tendency to explore the environment and to gain knowledge from it. By allowing the child to experience his environment in this manner, he will be able to understand all of its components and will be comfortable and at ease when alone in his room. From all of this activity, the child will then become better acquainted with the world in which he lives, and will arrive at the end of this process of self-construction. If we know that the process of self-construction in the child can only take place through the exploration of the environment, then this process is crucial. The child must be able to explore the environment in order to become adapted to his place and time. The child from zero to three explores the environment through the senses, but mostly through movement. By giving the child the opportunity to experience the low bed, he will benefit immensely. Not only will the child learn to function on his own, but this exposure to his environment will aid him in the development of independence, concentration, movement, self-esteem, and decision-making, leading to a healthy, well-adjusted child later on in life.
Now please sit back and ask yourself again: Is a crib really the best option for my child? I hope to have provided you with the evidence needed to further question the use of a crib in your household. But don’t worry if you currently use a crib and not a low bed for your child. The transition is actually quite easy and cheap. Just simply return the crib but keep the mattress!
This is so right on. Our son is 3 weeks old and we are cosleeping for the first few months (before he is sleeping through the night), but we already have his floor bed ready. He will also nap in it even before sleeping at night in it. Cribs have always confused me, to be honest – unless the baby is sharing with an older sibling or is in a room that otherwise cannot be made baby-safe, I just don’t see the need.
Co-sleeping??? Definite NO NO!! I would never…NEVER co-sleep with my baby. Every parent who has rolled over & suffocated their baby didn’t mean to do that. It’s what’s called an accident. As a parent, SIDS is always in the back of your mind, but I definitely don’t want to be the 1 helping them along to suffocation. There’s way too many other contraptions that’s been invented for babies in case a parent wants to not use a crib yet or a bassinet. So I will hope co-sleeping meant that the baby is near by in 1 of these nifty new inventions, bcuz it’s not fun having to attend babies funerals. I’ve done it.
You realize that comment was 7 years old? Also, bedsharing can be safe when done correctly. People have done it for centuries and America is one of the only countries which does not. SIDS does not equal suffocation. SIDS is sudden and unexplainable – suffocation has a known root/cause. You have a lot of fear mongering and misinformation in your post. I suggest you do some research.
http://cosleeping.nd.edu/safe-co-sleeping-guidelines/
for future parents who stumble upon this completely ignorant comment. Please do your research. Cosleeping and floor beds (futon) are the most natural and safest way for healthy parents (not intoxicated or smokers) to raise healthy babies.
I co-sleep with my baby. We have a 20 cm thick mattrass on a floor for us. And he has a 7.5 cm thick mattrass right beside. The level difference is good because I dont roll off from my mattrass as I feel where the bed ends. Like most people dont roll off the bed for same reason.Therefor I can hold his hand and comfort him when he needs but he also sleep on a different level in his own bed.
hi, i was wondering if you did this when they were a newborn? this is what i want to do as my husband and i already sleep on the floor, but I have had a hard time finding anyone who has used this same strategy
I’m an AMI -trained montessori teacher with a very active and curious 10 month old.
She’s always slept on a floor bed. Her room is baby-proofed. Recently she’s been crawling off of her bed at nap time and opening the curtains in her room. She’s also extremely light sensitive. This delays her falling asleep for her naps for a good 30-40 minutes twice a day. Recently, we caved and purchased a crib. Today she slept in it for both naps and both experiences were awful. She cried and cried and cried. I don’t think she self soothed to fall asleep but rather passed out from all the crying. She doesn’t do this with her floor bed. She’s had a floor bed experience her whole life and now I feel I’ve imprisoned her. I’m second guessing my decision to get the crib, but she’s too curious and become much too active to be trusted to sleep. She’s also learned to pull herself up to a standing position but she can’t yet get back down from. This results in her using the handles on her dresser to pull herself up but then crying bc she can’t get down. I’m feeling really defeated here. I feel like both floor bed and crib are proving to be a lose lose situation. Any help? Advice? Similar experiences?
This mother really needs her hand held right now.
Did you end up finding a solution that worked for you?
Hi Mona,
I see you posted this in August of 2017 so it has been a few months. I imagine you solved your issue! But I wanted to point out something I learned recently regarding your situation for future readers or for you if you are still searching for a good solution.
My son has always slept in his crib, and I am transitioning him to sleep on a floor bed.
You probably know that you can’t make them go to sleep but you can make them lay down and stay down. Here is a strategy i used: today at naptime I did not give him his blanket until he laid down. Of course, once he laid down and got the blanket he started sitting up/moving around on the mattress again. I started counting to 5 (he knows I mean business when I do this because there is always a consequence if I get to 5).
He kept laying down as I repeated my counts to 5 but would always get back up after a few seconds. I gently coached him to lay down and stay down with encouraging words and back-scratching– if he got up and wouldn’t lay back down with me I started counting again— each time with firm sincerity (keeping up the sincere tone is important along with the consequence of knowing that if I get to 5 he will have a consequence). He is asleep now on the mattress.
If this is similar to my other experiences with him, it will take a few more times of doing this until he is “trained” to lay down and stay down. But it will be well worth the effort.
The consequence I use is putting him in his crib (he doesn’t like to go in it unless he has a bottle or toys). It sounds like this consequence would work for your little one too.
I like that you realize you should not just let your child run around in his room until he wares out when it is time for him to go to bed. While giving your child freedom is a beautiful thing- there must be some expectation that responsibility (age appropriate responsibility , that is) be a part of this freedom. This is an essential to guiding him toward having true freedom– expecting that he is responsible with the freedom given. Then disciplining accordingly, removing freedoms that are abused.
Obviously an older post, I am also posting simply to add to the content…
My first thought was, “so remove the curtains and put up a Roman shade, or hem the curtains”. Second thought…”why does 30 – 40 minutes make a difference?” Third, “is she light sensitive or just really compelled to explore her environment and the silly 😜 adult has made it so she can’t see and must open the curtain?”
I do think children need firm boundaries…where boundaries are necessary. The poster who mentions counting to five, discipline, etc is engaging in a battle. Is that battle adding to the nurturing or development or education (as in life education, not formal)? Are there more logical and effective areas to insist on specific behavior? And have you considered that battles in one area may be leading to resistance from the child in others?
When I was in the military, I was enlisted and on a team where my expertise was unique. Everyone on the team outranked me. But fundamental to the team’s function was that I make virtually all of the operational decisions under normal (ha) circumstances. Despite not having finished university yet and despite being younger and less experienced than my team, they trusted my judgement until experience, or their technical expertise, or information I didn’t have, overrode my decisions. Because I was allowed to operate in my realm of expertise freely and with full support and respect, when situations came up where my decisions were overridden, even with a sharp order and no explanation of why, I was immediately agreeable to the override and I didn’t feel threatened, I felt more safe. The explanation came later and if we didn’t get around to it, I already knew that there was a good reason I was over ridden.
There is a school here in Austin that serves infants through Children’s House that uses the low bed in their infant room. I am happy to say that it has inspired a few parents to make the change in their home environments too!
It’s such a lovely thing to meet the needs of the baby and also the needs of the adult, who can easily lie down with baby in his own bed.
Thanks for a wonderful article!
I’m in love with this article. I don’t really like cribs myself.
A low bed is an excellent idea for children above the age for volitional movement where SIDS is not a risk anymore, such as those above 1 year of age. Prior to that, an environment without bulky items such as a blanket are required. The roll-out risk is minimal except around the 3-5 month range where the bed itself could become a SIDS risk. At that point a restriction is necessary on the open boundaries. When the child can be trusted to fall out of bed and not suffocate on the side of the mattress, then the low bed described would be great.
Great information and I will pass on to all my new mom friends. I have a few friends who rave about the low bed and a few who found it very frustrating and eventually gave up (probably went back to co-sleeping). I think if you can make this work for your family you will be doing something really worthwhile. That said, cribs have their value as my son truly loved being in his. He was very active and the visual boundaries made him relax knowing he was unable to explore physically. I have no regrets about using a crib or co-sleeping.
Michael, couldn’t one have a floor bed with a low railing like on toddler beds, one that is sufficient to keep the child from rolling out, but not nearly high enough to keep them from CHOOSING to enter and leave the bed?
My daughter slept in a bassinet by my side until 5 months old and then was in a crib for 4 months. At 9 months she would stand up, grab the bars, and cry every time she woke up in the middle of the night ( sometimes 8 times a night )…. terrible. I got well meaning advice to just “ferberize” her ( something which is against my own instincts ). Instead, I put her mattress on the floor and got rid of the crib. Slept fine ever since and would sign that she was tired and wanted to go to bed and crawl right in.
Ensuring that your child has a proper nursery is every parents worry. Between finding the right crib and making sure you have the most Modern Baby Bedding that will keep an infant comfortable and safe is the ultimate goal. Keepingintheloop.com is was one of the sites I was referred to from a neighbor after she had her second child. As a expecting mother, I was somewhat “out of the loop”, but through this site, I was able to get everything I needed for the nursery!
To Uly;
The Montessori books recommend a very slim mattress, the type used for trundle beds, so that if baby rolls, she won’t go very far. If this is a concern a couple of pillows or a soft rug can be placed next to the bed. If they are sleeping they would be comfortable here, and if they can crawl they may just crawl right back into bed. If room permits one could even get a full bed, and the baby could roll all she wanted. In any case, rolling out of a floor bed pails in comparison to falling out of a crib, when baby practices climbing!
I am wondering if there are any studies or standards regarding increased risk for floor beds? I am very interested in the idea starting at approx. 6 mos, but am concerned about the possibility of baby getting her face stuck between the mattress and wall (and suffocate) or rolling off and getting stuck between the mattress and carpet. I don’t want to get a floor bed frame, as it strikes me a more likely to cause injuries due to roll-off.
Awesome! I don’t like cribs at home, but we use them at the Montessori School nI work at now I wanna switch to floor beds!
Does anyone know where to buy these floor beds? Size? thickness? what store?
Any advice for those of us in the Southwest who have to contend with the occasional scorpion? I would love to use floor beds with any children I may have, but desert living has its own unique challenges.
What a great article! We didn’t use a crib with either of our children – before we even knew about Montessori – it just didn’t seem like the right kind of environment. It scared me to have a child trapped (not to mention the worry of crib malfunctions & recalls!) where they can’t get out if they wanted to. My babies shared the bed with us (we moved our own bed onto the floor and baby-proofed the room for safety), then moved to a bed on the floor next to ours (we used a tightly rolled blanket, like a bolster pillow against the wall so there was no worry of entrapment between wall & mattress), then into their own spaces with their beds still on the floor. They are independent, and good sleepers now at ages 3 & 6 with no sleep issues at all.
Kelly,
We’re thinking of doing the same thing – moving our own bed onto the floor but our main worry is that we’re living in a pretty cold climate (PA). Would you mind sharing how you went about this change? Did you just sleep on your bed mattress and put it on the carpet? Did you put your newborn on the mattress right away or did you let them sleep in a moses basket? thanks for tips!
DM– We used a thin enough mattress that rolling off wasn’t going to cause any injuries. The mattress was also held firmly against the wall, and didn’t slip because it had enough of a rug/carpeting underneath it that the friction kept the mattress from moving anywhere.
I’m not aware of any studies on floor beds (I wonder if there’s even a large enough sample size in the US!) but honestly, with all the recalls on cribs this past year common sense tells me a floor bed (in a child-proofed room) can’t be any more dangerous than a crib. In fact, that’s one reason I wanted to use a floor bed to begin with– between the risk of legs and arms getting caught between the slats, and of climbing and fall out of the crib itself, I felt MUCH safer having my baby sleep on the floor!
With my third child we decided to use the floor bed. My other two children have blossomed from attending AMI montessori schools, so I wanted to implement what I could for my infant. She co-slept in co-sleeper for the first several weeks. Then, we put her on the floor bed. She goes to sleep easily. When she is tired, she lets me know. Naptimes and bedtimes are easy, unlike the long drawn out routines with my other two.
Now, my daughter is 9 months old. She is crawling. She had been very content in her floor bed. But now, she crawls out of the bed and wanders around looking for me. Her floor bed with a low shelf is set up in the sitting room of our bedroom. She has gotten into the habit of waking up to nurse, although she slept through the night before. It started with teething and colds. Sometimes, I go into the guest room, just to get some sleep. She gets very insistent if I don’t nurse her.
We have thought about moving her into the guest room, but we will be relocating in six months.
Any suggestions would be appreciated.
Hello! We are researching the idea of using a Montessori floor bed, as our little one is due in December. We love the idea but are concerned about how to “baby proof” the room. Does this mean zero cords on the floor or within reach? I expect so. Do you ever worry about the baby learning to remove the outlet covers? We also have hot water radiators in every room, so I am trying to figure out a way to shield it from the baby/toddler. Any advice would be tremendously appreciated.
It seemed intuitively wrong to put my baby in a crib, much less anywhere that wasn’t my bed. Now that she bigger, she has a low bed and loves having her own special space to make herself cozy and read. Thanks for the good read!
The futon shown is a SIDS risk. A child could push her face between the wall and bed and suffocate. A proper futon setup for a child has the futon well away from the wall. If you want to post a picture, please make sure it’s a happy picture of a safe arrangement.
My son is now 9 months and we started using a floor bed when he was 2. We loved it at first, but now that he is crawling he seems unable to resist the urge to crawl out of bed even when he is extremely tired. It is not that he falls down, but he can’t resist not crawling. There is a huge rubber matt underneath the mattress but it is not enough and every night for the past month I have found him sleeping on the hard floor and it breaks my heart. Any suggestions? I am about to get him a crib.
I too would love some suggestions about a wiggly crawling bubba.
Carla- You could try putting a rug down so the floor’s a bit softer for him, but he also may not mind sleeping on the hard floor… otherwise he’d probably let you know! ; )
I’m the same Jess that commented first on this article – our son is now almost 20 months old and we have been using the floor bed since he was about 6 months old. LOVE it. He decidedly was NOT sleeping through the night in our bed – waking every hour or more – and once we put him in his room he switched almost instantly to sleeping 7:30-7:30, waking once to feed around 2 AM. In the morning he chilled out for about 20 minutes playing on his own happily. By 12 months he dropped the 2AM feeding entirely as well.
The only hiccup we’ve had with the floor bed so far is around 18 months he decided to get the sads every time we left him there for the night and crawl to his door crying, where he would immediately fall asleep on the hard floor… only to wake and be angry mid-night. We solved this by dragging a crib mattress behind us as we shut the door, and now we find him sometimes on his bed and sometime on the “door mattress.” Silly boy. He still wakes himself up and moves around playing in the morning.
I have a question – has anyone tackled the multiple children on floor beds in one room question? This may become relevant for us eventually and I haven’t seen any commentary on the effect a 2-year-old would have on a baby’s sleep quality (and vice versa) when they have total mobile access to each other. 🙂
@Carla – our son also did the wiggles out of his bed. We put a rug next to it and it lasted for about a month. We didn’t really worry when we found him sleeping on it – he didn’t seem to mind, after all. After he stopped the wiggly dance, we had no troubles ’til the situation I outlined above in my previous comment at 18 months.
I have been using a floor bed for my daughter since she was 4 months old and have just posted my experience with it including a video and pictures on http://www.montessorigirl.posterous.com. I struggled with the crawling too but worked it out and she is now doing great. Check it out and good luck!
@ Jess L:
have you found anything on a toddler and an infant sleeping in the same room? on floor beds? I once read a blog about 2 infant twin girls, and they did the floor bed. Maybe, an infant and a toddler will be ok. Let me see if I can find the blog.
oh, and my son did the same thing. Times would he would crawl out fo bed and cry next to the door- pass out – and we would carry him back to his bed or we would simply leave him ( he would wake up angry- because he was tired and not in his bed ) but he learned to crawl back to into bed. Usually,this crying next to the door only happened when he was teething, sick, or something changed in his schedule.
PLEASE let us know about the 2 sleeping in 1 room =]
@ Tera Maxwell:
we had similar story. We knew it was time for our boy to use the floor bed, ( unfortunately, we started late- around 9/10 months )he was in his own room though but our worry was that we were moving in 3 months. Honestly, what I have realized about babies they adjust pretty ok. We as parents, are the ones that get freaked out over small changes. lol!
Anyways, in my opinion… I think you should try moving her into the guest room, for now, untill you move. Keep in mind it will probably take her 3- 4 weeks to adjust. Some crying, maybe even some crying next to the door or maybe she will do fine.
Which ever decision you make, make sure you and your partner stick it out, consistency is importrant to babies. Bed time routines help them out alot as well- secure / comfort.
What worked for our son, we arranged his room in same setting as his old room. So, bed location, shelves, mirror try keep them in same area at you new place.
Wish you the best. Enjoy your little one. And trust your mommy instincts… we could look for all the advice in the world but you know whats best for you child and what will work with your families lifestyle =]
Great article!
@Jess L, @Erika G: I’m interested in the multiple floor beds/toddler+infant setup too. If anyone finds anything (or has first hand experience), please post back here.
@Anna, @Jess L, @Erika G:
I don’t have any experience, so I could be off-base, but I would be concerned with an infant and toddler sleeping in the same room, about a toddler crawling into bed with the infant, and from what I’ve read, there could be risk or the toddler rolling onto the baby at night.
I don’t have any info on multiple beds with young infants, since I was a late starter, but I did start when my youngest was 11 months old and my oldest was almost 3…they had a few nights of curiosity and playing, but eventually sleep won out 🙂 After a few days, they went to bed fine in the same room…
I had no idea this was part of the Montessori philosophy! I just got rid of our crib (we never had success with it and have instead been cosleeping with our daughter). I git a 4″ high twin mattress at IKEA last week. Under $100. Anyway, I am not sure how to get her to be more comfortable at night. She is very very needy all night (wakes 5+ times always, with a record of 12). She nurses back to sleep, which I don’t mind but I thought it would get better by now (she’s 7mos). I honestly thought that once she was in her own room she would have fewer disturbances and might only wake 2-3x. Wrong! So now I go into her room and lay with her until she goes to sleep (usually she gives me nursing signs). But according to others, you just put them to bed and close the door and they’ll cry themselves to sleep? I’m confused… that feels so un-nurturing … is there some Montessori literature that could help me here? I am sooooo tired.
I had never heard of this but I like the idea of my child being able to sleep when he wants to. My son is 9 months old and has been in a crib all his life, do you think he could still transition to this? He is walking well so that might help him.
And how does this work with scheduling. What if baby is so interested that he doesn’t sleep and they need to be put in a situation where they are almost forced to calm down and relax so that they can get the sleep they need?
I have a question.
I plan on having. Second baby, their age difference will. Be of around 2 years if everything goes according to our plans.
How do you not worry about the toddler going and touching the baby, or when the baby is crawling going into the toddlers bed and bothering them?
Help please?i really. Want to do this!
I have a memory foam mattress topper. It is queen sized. I have used it off and on for my daughter since 5 months. It is big enough that she can move around without getting on the floor and is only about 2 inches thick so no worries about falling off. In the daytime she will often carry toys over to it and play, and as early as 6 months she would crawl over and lay down to nap all on her own.
Tonight i decided to take down her crib. I am so tired of her crying when i put her in it. And for 20 mins she flip flops trying to get comfy. She just turned a year old and the morning of her birthday, she woke me screaming. Her thigh was wedged between the slates. I was unable to get her out my 17 year old son and hubby were able to force her leg out.
I have a tall metal baby gate at her bedroom door.,i have secured her bookshelves to the wall. Outlets are covered by furniture or covered ( you can buy blanks at home depo ) they cover the outlets completely.
My daughter is almost 8 months. She co sleeps with us. She has always been on a schedule and puts herself to sleep, if we are not ready for bed. She loves to sleep on a blanket on the floor, when not using our bed. She has fallen asleep in her crib but doesn’t use it for bed. She has been standing since 6 months, holding on to things. All she wants to do is stand in her crib, then she finally falls and whacks her head against the bars. It’s terrible and nothing about that seems safe to me. I don’t like the crib. I have a naturpedic mattress, which is both safe and comfortable. We also use the snuza baby monitor, that attaches right to her diaper, for any issue that would cause her to stop breathing. I am all for floor sleeping. We need to baby proof our room or just move her in to hers full time. We are relocating in a few months, that will determine which direction her bed moves to. Anyway, cribs just don’t seem safe. Play pens are soft and portable, if you need to trap them in to an area for a bit, off the floor. Otherwise we use baby gates and they work great for a safe area for her to play.
On my 4th baby and as far as I am concerned all this baby sleeping in parents bed and on mattresses/blankets on the floor sounds more unsafe than a plain simple crib. I have had very happy healthy babies/kids without all this fuss. My littleone is 2 soon and still in her cot (crib)..soon I will get her a small sized bed that will grow with her. Just like her 2 sisters and 1 brother before her.
I want to transition my 19 month old to sleeping on a mattress on the floor and my question is my 6 week old sleeps in a small crib in the same room as us. What suggestions/advice do you have for how to make mattress on the floor sleeping work for two sharing the same room? Thanks!
I am a mother of three and have worked in child care for 30 years. If you have the ideal situation and the ideal child this all would be great however, this is rarely the case. I have to also say that I cannot believe that so many people still think it is a great idea to co-sleep. There have been so many articles and news stories about this being disasterous and fatal for babies. I too fell asleep at times with my children and would cat nap in a recliner with them, it is a very warm, bonding feeling but it is really not a good idea. Besides, why would you want to do this and how can the average person find the time to do this all the time? Many children will not sleep or get enough sleep if not made to. That may sound harsh but it is true. If given a choice to sleep or play how many are going to choose to sleep? The idea of a baby crawling around while the family is asleep is crazy and dangerous to me. Babies as well as toddlers do need lots of time to explore and develop physically and cognitively that is what play time is for. Thank God we don’t routinely stick our kids in playpens for hours at a time anymore for our own convenience but I do think that there is nothing wrong with giving very young children the message that we are not always going to sleep with you, we are close by if you need us and you can do this on your own. I also think it is very important to give the firm message that not everything in life is a choice and bed time is bed time. It doesn’t have to be negative but they should not be allowed to roam around while everyone else is asleep and parents need to have the time and peace of mind to be able to get things done around the house, have some personal time and time with their spouse. If you make yourself a slave to your children they will soon come to expect it and you will resent it and be worn out. Absolutely, your children come first but you have to take care of yourself also to be able to care for them. During the other times, play, sing, dance, be creative show them the joy and love you have for them in how you treat them, but that doesn’t mean you should let them do whatever, whenever they want. Although I love many of the philosophies of Montessori, this is definately not one of them
What about using a toddler bed?
“I have to also say that I cannot believe that so many people still think it is a great idea to co-sleep.”
The article does not say anything about co-sleeping with the babies, actually, it’s the opposite, it shows that low beds promote independency for the child.
Hi, I have a 6 month old and a 2 year old. I really like the idea of floor beds and would live to try it out but I want to know what suggestions you have for siblings sharing a room? I’m nervous leaving a 2 year old and 6 month old in the same room all night long withou supervision. Even if I leave the 6 month old in the crib, the 2 year old will poke at her and wake her up. What suggestions do you have for very young siblings?
I have a question. I’m researching using a floor or toddler bed for my extremely active, probably will pull herself out of bed any minute 13 month old. What exactly is the difference between trapping them in their room vs. trapping them in their bed? Either way, they can’t get out, or feed themselves. I guess I could put her potty in the room with her, and we already have no outlets near the floor where she could reach.. But as far as being able to see out/participate, I don’t know that there is much difference, unless you are sleeping in the same room. She would never have gone to sleep on her own if she wasn’t in her own room, trapped in the bed. She would go on for over 24 hours of no sleep. She is dropping her only nap as it is, and can go 17+ hours without sleep. I’m not sure what to do here, but perhaps the floor bed will help somehow. She will just stay up and party though, how do you circumvent that?
Like any new addition to a routine, the introduction of a floor bed when the child is older will take time and patience from the adult. It is recommended to use one from an early age – once the child outgrows the bassinet – so that it is all the child knows and therefore the idea of all of a sudden having thos extra freedom will be eliminated. However this is not always the case! Keep in mind what kind of bedtime routine you have and be consistent with this. The child will soon learn that when you put them down it is time to sleep. As for the baby gate at the door this allows the child to still have the freedom of interacting with some toys in their room etc. without being stuck in their crib. My twin boys are currently asleep on their low beds! 🙂
I don’t understand why a crib is bad, but a baby gate at the door is ok.
Cionna, at least with a baby gate at the door the child can still wake up on his or her own, climb off the bed and happily interact with some toys. It is not suggested to keep any toys etc. in the crib with the child so when he or she wakes up he/she will need to get the parent’s attention and be removed from the crib. The baby gate at the door is a safety precaution, however one might just choose to keep the door shut!
First of all, thank you so much for helping me realize this is an ok idea. I have no intention of putting my child into a crib as they are unsafe and so impersonal.
Those of you that feel co-sleeping is wrong, please check your resources before you spout off at the mouth. Co-sleeping has been done at the beginning of time. Do you really think Mary kept baby Jesus in the manger every time she wanted to sleep? Do you really think the cavewomen found a special baby rock to put their child on?
I’m thrilled to get the crib mattress out and placed in my daughter’s bedroom. I’m so happy that this will give us (my whole family) a chance to get back into our normal sleeping pattern. I love the picture of the floor bed above. The chance of baby falling off the floor bed is huge but its no more chance of hurting her than if she were to fall while standing up. Babies are so resilient and God knew what he was doing when he made them. They are not made of china and a few bumps and bruises along the way is normal. The chance of baby suffocating is nonexistent if you keep the mattress away from the wall and place no pillows around. Babies do not need blankets, they have the wonderful sack gowns for that.
I’m so thrilled to get this room set up my husband is bringing the mattress down from storage as we speak.
Have a blessed day and good luck in all your endeavors!
I am 25 years old and 5months pregnant I am not sure which way I will go. Crib? Bassinet? Floor bed? All I know is all of the above is alot of research but I do know that my own mother had taken the crib apart when I was a baby (few months old) and just had the crib mattress on yhe floor. She talked about her friends and family questioning it but really how big is the crib mattress? Thats not a big fall and I slept theough the night then on! 🙂
My son has slept in an enclosed area (first a pack n play, now a crib) since birth, and he doesn’t have any negative experiences or feelings about his sleeping arrangement. Sleep has always been an easy, loving, peaceful time for us.
Our twins have slept on a bed on the floor since 8 weeks of age
However, at 14 months we are running into a dilemma where the two of them run around the room playing for an hour after we put them to bed. We have to leave for work by 7am, so we try to put them down by 7.30… its still light out and they don’t want to sleep. we’ve bought block out curtains, but now I’m having to resort to using a pack n play to get them to fall asleep on time.. just something to think about…
dear will,
do you think your situations would be any different if you would have gotten a crib ? i do not think so. they would have still played and they would climb out of the crib and probably have an accident. at least this way they are not in dangeour. the problem is not the low bed here, the problem is making them fall asleep. sleep comes at the end of the way, what are you doing during the day ? do they get anough body and mind excercise ? sounds like they are full of energy and sounds like there is no real authority. there is no light in the room if you have those strong blindes that you “install” outside of the window you will not get any light inside. what do you think happens in the kindergarten where you have 14 do 20 children ? we just put them down to nap and they sleep ? yes, maybe a few of them are like that, but some of them need attention, meaning you need to stay with them until they fall asleep. good luck !
Thank you for your article ! My son is now 14 months, and we started a bed in the floor for him about a month ago; I really think that he is much more relaxed and sleeping better from that day ! Actually, he never liked the crib (who can judge him?), and some how we had adopted the “family bed” option… he still awake in the middle of the night, but now he jyst come to our bed in his own feet. clearly the family bed is not the same as the independent floor beds, but is it preventing somehow his explorative side ? Thank you again!
I got a low bed instead of a crib. I got something called a Low Modern Bed from a company. They said that they had quite a few people who wanted low beds as an alternative for their kids. I was torn between the above one and their Low Loft but thought I would use the Low Modern Bed for the future in an attic conversion so…suits me too!
Hi there, I have had my LO in a floor bed (on a pebble lite mattress http://www.nooksleep.com/pebble-lite.html) since she was 4 weeks. I love the philosophy behind his approach but I’m struggling to stick to it because she rolls out of bed every night on to her stomach or rolls so that her face is against the wall. She is OK but as a FTM I’m so worried about SIDS. Any advice or tricks to prevent this?
Thanks!
I know your comment is old… But some people put a pool noodle under the fitted sheet along the long edge of the mattress to prevent roll-offs. Hope this helps others wondering the same thing!
Definitely helpful!!
Hi, I have a question about a floor bed. I have a boy 4 months old. I’m planning to have a bed like the one on link https://www.etsy.com/listing/511301857/children-bed-toddler-bed-house-bed-kids?ref=shop_home_active_16. The difference is that the barrier will be all around the bed but it will be removable. When my baby will grow up, I will remove front barrier. I’m afraid of my son rolling out of bed and damaging himself. What do you think about a floor bed with barriers? Also I have a question about the height of mattress and height of barrier. What would be the max height of mattress for floor bed? And what about the height of barrier for a baby?
Thanks for your answer
Hi, thank you for the very clear article. Our 13 month old son has always been a not so good sleeper. He’s always slept either with us or in a side bed (initially with a side open to ours, from 6mo on an actual crib next to our bed). For the past month, we’ve been all co-sleeping on our mattress on the floor in what will be his room. He has always been dependent on nursing and/or rocking to fall asleep. We cold-turkey stopped rocking a couple of weeks ago and he’s been sleeping better. He nurses a lot during the night but has longer stretches of sleep, particularly the first one. Sometimes he won’t fall asleep nursing and will put himself to sleep by talking and rolling around. He would never do this before and hated his crib. He needs our presence though. Our goal is to eventually transition him into his own mattress on the floor in his own room and we’ll return to our room. We’re already letting him nap on the floor mattress on his own (although he falls asleep nursing) and let him come out when he’s ready. I’d be very happy if you would give us any tips that might help us in this journey. We’re patient and convinced there’s no set in stone right way to do this so we’re trying to follow our son’s cues as much as possible. Thanks in advance.
my web site : http://www.babycribs-forsale.com
I enjoyed the article. However, I need to ask for advice on floorbed. Our 5 month old has been in a floor bed for a few weeks now. We transitioned from cosleeping. It started out fine, he’d wake twice to nurse. Now as of a few days ago he’s not sleeping in his floor bed. He rolls off his bed lays on the floor and screams. He is in a zipadee zip (transitioned from swaddle). He wakes every 15-30 minutes. Only difference is this week he has shown a lot of attempts to crawl. I’ve tried everything to get him to sleep.
Where can I find the floor bed
Hi Raquel, I don’t know if you will get this message, but I’m so hopeful that you do! Our baby boy has just turned 11 months and has always slept next to our bed in a cot with the side down and we have more recently been bed sharing. He nurses to sleep for almost every nap and bedtime sleep and wakes frequently through the night, nursing is the only thing that gets him back to sleep. I’m really keen to try a floor bed, how did it work out for you guys? Our boy doesn’t seem to like his crib at all, if he rolls and touches the side he’s awake and annoyed. I’m desperate to find a sleep solution that helps him and I. Although I love the idea of bed sharing (and it has helped somewhat) I feel my sleep is bad some nights. Thanks in advance!
Hi Amelie,
I see you were in the exact same position I am now (my boy is 10 months old). I am thinking of ditching the cot and putting the mattress on a floor. My boy also nurses to sleep and we have bed shared from pretty early in because it was the only way to get any sleep. We attached the cot to the bed and removed a side but I am worried he will get out of it and hurt himself. Ihave just returned to work and am finding the lack of sleep more of an issue (I do wonder if we are disturbing each other). How did things work out for you? Did you try the floor bed? Did it make a difference?
Our just turned 2 year old has, from birth (extreme colic, reflux, allergies and lip tie) always been a very passionate and headstrong young lady. We are a 100% Montessori household, and as I’ll be homeschooling her (I’m qualified in mainstream), we will continue with Montessori methods.
Blanketing this one area, however, to all children, is something that I disagree with.
I completely understand the theory behind it and think it’s absolutely beautiful to raise children this way; however, for our child in particular and her personality, anything other than a cot/crib at the moment does not work. I’m sure she’s not the only one out there like this, who even at 11:30pm (we experimented this with her one night) with her eyes closing on their own, fights sleep to the death.
Her cot is where she feels secure, and her mind actually allows her to settle and shut down when she’s in there.
Definitely something to think about…
My baby has been sleeping with me since her birth. We don’t have any cribs at home.
This article is full of wonderful thoughts but here’s my question- Do you know anyone who falls asleep independently in their floor bed? And stays there for a solid night’s sleep? If so, how old are those children? Many of my friends use this method thinking the crib is too jail-like. However, many of those kids are now 2 or 3 years old and NOT ONE of them sleeps through the night. Because he has freedom of exploration all night long. I think this should be addressed… Is exploration important? Absolutely. Do we also want our kids to learn to sleep? I think that’s an important skill and crucial for all members of the family. In our case, we didn’t get a crib until our baby was 10 months old and he LOVES it. It IS his safe space. It IS his sleeping space and as soon as he is in there he knows what he’s there to do. He goes to sleep at 7:30 – almost always without a fuss, and wakes up well rested at 6 am. He’s been doing this since he was about 11 months. I think a floor bed can serve many wonderful purposes, don’t get me wrong. I’m just not convinced based on my experience and the experience of those around me that it can actually function as a sleeping bed until the child is much,much older.
Hi,
Here is a nice option of floor/ house bed for child. It looks very beautiful and is according to Montessori princiles.
https://www.etsy.com/shop/SweetHOMEfromwood?ref=hdr_shop_menu
Interesting blog. Thanks for sharing!
A very good and useful article. I will take your advice into account. Thank you for the information
Hi, I have a question about a floor bed. I have a boy 4 months old. I’m planning to have a bed like the one on link https://www.etsy.com/listing/511301857/children-bed-toddler-bed-house-bed-kids?ref=shop_home_active_16. The difference is that the barrier will be all around the bed but it will be removable. When my baby will grow up, I will remove front barrier. I’m afraid of my son rolling out of bed and damaging himself. What do you think about a floor bed with barriers? Also I have a question about the height of mattress and height of barrier. What would be the max height of mattress for floor bed? And what about the height of barrier for a baby?
Thanks for your answer
Any suggestions for alternatives to a floor bed when mom (me) has a physical disability and would not be able to place an infant safely in a floor bed? As of now, my plan is to transition to a floor bed from a crib in an otherwise Montessori-style room when my daughter is walking. Other alternatives?
My daughter started sleeping in her crib in her own room straight from hospital. I slept on the daybed in her room for feedings. At 2 months she would sleep in crib 11pm-4am, feed, return to sleep until 9am. At 1.5 yrs old, I’d put her to bed at 8pm and want to sit nearby. She’d sit up in her crib, pull the paci out of her mouth and say “Mommy, go!” pointing to the door. She had her bunny, her blanket and her binky. That’s what she wanted. She’s 8 now and she’s loving, attached and yet fiercely independent.
I didn’t read anything – just went on instinct, and it all turned out well. 😁
I personally strongly disagree with co-sleeping and wouldn’t ever do it. I’m a super violent sleeper, usually. While I can see how this would work for some babies, it definitely would not have worked with my cousin’s daughter: if she wasn’t in an enclosed space, she wasn’t interested in sleeping, period. And no one likes a sleep-deprived child! But for babies that it does work with, that’s awesome. I don’t think I could strain my back like that, but I know others are different. So long as baby is safe, I’m happy with whatever works for whomever.
Lovely article. The fear in so many of these comments is sad though… there is ample research (U of Notre Dame has excellent support on their website for folks who co-sleep) on safe co-sleeping in alignment with how humans have slept for generations & in non-European populations, mostly still do. For those with questions on multiples, mine moved from co-sleeping with us to co-sleeping together on a floor bed & then a captains bed which they can still independently crawl in and out of. We don’t leave them to cry for us at the door, or anywhere really, but stay with them until they are peaceful in drifting to sleep, or are asleep. Rituals like a song, reading, deep breathing together help set that stage. Mine are 4, 2 & 7mo & I have zero regrets. Sleep and cuddly bedtime is a joy for us. A chance to catch up on cuddles after a long day of work & play.
Isn’t a room with a gate just a larger crib?
Wow this is a good idea maybe I’ll do with when I have a child! I asked my boyfriend “why do you think people use baby beds instead of regular size beds?” I tried looking it up and came across this website about floor beds I read the whole thing and the concept is very interesting. I only have a few questions. What if they try climbing over the baby gate? Do you get toys that are less noisy, such as made out of foam? Do you put the bed close to the wall or in the middle of the room? If you put it to the wall would the baby roll over to the wall and suffocate? Do you make sure you don’t choose toys that they climb on or stick like toys so they don’t run and take an eye out etc.?
This is quite an interesting read.
I had not looked at cribs in this light as they are simply the traditional bedtime furniture we are accustomed to. From the comments above, there are definitely pros and cons, not to mention fears.
Nonetheless, I have found a low bed worth considering and will be looking forward to giving it a try.
Dear Author, you have not cited any studies, nor do you have any scientific evidence to declare that cribs are unsafe and floor beds are safer options. I see many parents commenting on here easily turned from cribs due to your portrayal of cribs as jailing/restricting a child’s exploration, and your use of the word evidence (which you do not have). First off, creating a safe space where you can limit SIDS risks is protective not limiting. I do know that there are risk factors for co-sleeping that could be lessened by certain precautions such as no bedding/pillows, having the bed on the floor, and having only one adult share the bed with the baby. That being said, the truth is that these ideas are extrapolated from studies but have not actually been studied on their own. The evidence is not complete enough to determine that co-sleeping can be done safely. In fact, most western beds are not designed to be as stiff as an infant bed and can be a suffocation risk on their own. The safest place for an infant to sleep is in a Crib (according to current evidence). Guidelines change as we discover more about cribs and what is safe. Yes, cribs have been recalled so have car seats you wouldn’t advocate against using a car seat, would you? Parents, please look for cribs that meet the most recent standards and always look out for any recalls. I came here looking for actual evidence, but relying on Montessori’s scientific (really theoretical/psychological) research from long ago, rather than listening to the American Association of Pediatrics current recommendations, is just ridiculous. Montessori education practices have some merit, but they cannot compete with current science.